Joined Oct 2010
1K Posts | 0+
midlands
Joined Oct 2010
1K Posts | 0+
midlands
Feck that's a beauty!
I feel a lot better now.
No I don't ...
Still have Pikemyths scorn ringing in my ears!
Joined Feb 2010
210 Posts | 0+
Dormansland, Surrey, UK
Only because it might take away some of the shame you're feeling, Newelly...
On a bike that wasn't an Aprilia, I'm sorry to say, left the heated handgrips on (hard-wired to battery). Came out of work, pissing rain, cold and dark. Bike was of course dead (****, methinks). Tries bump-starting 'til on me knees. Give up. Calls out the AA. Promptly arrive, charge it up and wahey! I'm going in a mo'. Let's just adjust bag on back, so puts side-stand down. And we can all see what's coming...
Gets back on, drops into 1st, engine stops 'cos of side-stand - you f...ing *****, methinks. Battery of course has had no decent charge so won't start said bike (TWAAATTT!). AA van is over the horizon. Makes another call to AA to get different van back. 2hrs later on on my way. Should have been home at 8pm, walked in at midnight.
I'm not embarrassed to admit it'll live with me forever. There are others as well, but I shan't bore you all anymore.
On a bike that wasn't an Aprilia, I'm sorry to say, left the heated handgrips on (hard-wired to battery). Came out of work, pissing rain, cold and dark. Bike was of course dead (****, methinks). Tries bump-starting 'til on me knees. Give up. Calls out the AA. Promptly arrive, charge it up and wahey! I'm going in a mo'. Let's just adjust bag on back, so puts side-stand down. And we can all see what's coming...
Gets back on, drops into 1st, engine stops 'cos of side-stand - you f...ing *****, methinks. Battery of course has had no decent charge so won't start said bike (TWAAATTT!). AA van is over the horizon. Makes another call to AA to get different van back. 2hrs later on on my way. Should have been home at 8pm, walked in at midnight.
I'm not embarrassed to admit it'll live with me forever. There are others as well, but I shan't bore you all anymore.
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Joined Oct 2010
1K Posts | 0+
midlands
There now ... that feels better doesn't it?
It's good to get twatty things off your chest.
Come on now ... what else was there?
Don't worry ... I'm the only one reading the thread.
Look into my eyes not around the eyes into the eyes:suspect
heres another, just to make you feel better
got me 89 gsxr750 mint condition, first day at work everyone comes out to watch me zoom up the road.
I do a full gp start to impress all the ladies and realise 0.5seconds later the me disk lock is still on!!! and over the handlebars I go. after picking up the bike off the floor I try to start it while stood at the side of it only to realise its still in gear and falls over again on the other side. wrecked every single panel and cost £1600 to rebuild.
got me 89 gsxr750 mint condition, first day at work everyone comes out to watch me zoom up the road.
I do a full gp start to impress all the ladies and realise 0.5seconds later the me disk lock is still on!!! and over the handlebars I go. after picking up the bike off the floor I try to start it while stood at the side of it only to realise its still in gear and falls over again on the other side. wrecked every single panel and cost £1600 to rebuild.
Joined Oct 2010
1K Posts | 0+
midlands
Omg!
What a beauty!
I ought to have started a "twatty things I've done" thread ...
Some of these are priceless!
The twatiest thing you've done mate has to be posting up a pic of yourself in urban cammo trousers. I'm scared for life.
Twatiest thing I've ever done on a bike is stopped at traffic lights took hands off handlebars and stretched then accidentally kicked my BMW into 1st. Yep it stalled but jumped just enough to put me off balance and send the bike tipping to the right. I found out it's impossible to stop a nearly 200kg bike from falling sideways with just one leg. Luckily, to this day I still don't know how I did it I managed to get my left leg over the bike and stop it hitting the deck. People behind must have wondered what I was doing but got on and rode off as if nothing had happened. That is until the next day. Bike was perfectly fine but I ached like a ******* the next day. Every muscle in my body ached.
Haven't stretched on the bike since although I tend now to put my left foot down predominantly not my right even when stopped on the flat.
Twatiest thing I've ever done on a bike is stopped at traffic lights took hands off handlebars and stretched then accidentally kicked my BMW into 1st. Yep it stalled but jumped just enough to put me off balance and send the bike tipping to the right. I found out it's impossible to stop a nearly 200kg bike from falling sideways with just one leg. Luckily, to this day I still don't know how I did it I managed to get my left leg over the bike and stop it hitting the deck. People behind must have wondered what I was doing but got on and rode off as if nothing had happened. That is until the next day. Bike was perfectly fine but I ached like a ******* the next day. Every muscle in my body ached.
Haven't stretched on the bike since although I tend now to put my left foot down predominantly not my right even when stopped on the flat.
Joined Oct 2010
698 Posts | 23+
burnham on sea
**** Alert ...... borrowed my brothers aprilia rs 50 a few years ago , rode off in jeans n trainers and everything was going fine ..... got to the bottom of our village and stopped , went to put my left foot down and .... oh bollocks , my lace was caught round the gear shift and over i went , looked like i forgot to put my foot down , was stuck there 5 mins trying to get my lace untangled !
Got a few more but i aint telling !!!!
Got a few more but i aint telling !!!!
Joined Oct 2010
1K Posts | 0+
midlands
Joined Dec 2008
6K Posts | 84+
Usually at the top of the apple tree.
shot, done the same mucker, right ootside ma local boozer. 'Course the fuds had to come out and shout abuse at me. Plus a lassie I'd fancied fir a while was crossing the road to go to the train station wae her mates, they were all done up wae their summer dresses on. I'm lying there under the bike thinkin please don't come over here, they did and they tried to lift the bike up enough fir me to escape. I didn't know whither to hide ma face in shame or get an eyeful of them gorgeous legs, guess I'm jist a letch. Any way I got the bike back up and on it's stand, had a look at it and thought feck it I'm going fir a pint wae the laughing hyenas. I reckon at least two of them pished themsels laughing at me, fuds.
That's just a bad cracking groin newelly. Old rugby injury along with many other aches and pains from the game
Joined Mar 2011
268 Posts | 2+
Errf
My twatty was at a group ride we had stopped for a sit and I went to leave and the Buell kept dying when Id let the clutch out. WTF says me, little boy about ten says put up sidestand. Uhhhh yeah will do and away I go. Humility is a good thing. Itll happen again.
Joined Oct 2010
1K Posts | 0+
midlands
Nice one Wilee
That's one of the worst "twatty things I've done" posts so far....
Imagine buying a Buell!
Joined Mar 2011
268 Posts | 2+
Errf
Yeah, I know. Got rid of that thing but quick. More than made up for it by buying the T? At least Im in better company with you lot.
Joined Apr 2009
273 Posts | 1+
North Yorkshire
