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get yer rants oot,,,,,,

People who walk along waving their arms excessively. They look really really ******' stupid and they piss me off enormously.

I always walk past them (they usually shuffle along really slowly, which also REALLY boils my piss, what is this, a friggin' funeral procession) really closely so they smack me with their stupid imbecillic flailing arm and get all embarassed and have to apologise. That'll learn them. *******s.
 
Aldo said:
S, jist think, they're all fuds mucker.
Click to expand...

I know and normally I'm a pretty laid back unstressed bloke. There's something about driving habits tho that winds me up.

Anyway I'm just going to add one more:

Stupid old bints who for no apparent reason park so close to my bike (which is perfectly parked) they struggle to get out. **** off you ginger dyed wrinkly old haggis - stop going to the gym nobody gives a toss grandma!!!!!

Ok feel better now :)
 
What about them tossers doing 2mph in a town centre looking for somewhere to park. Ffs that makes me wanna kill. Was behind a turd clan in BewtsyCoed? on Sunday acting like *****, loads of em, spotty kids shuvvin crisps and ice cream in their gobs and mammy and uncle Pete both 'avvin a ***' weaving about looking for a none existant space outside a chippy no doubt. ******s.
In front of them was some coffin dodgers doing the same looking for a cardigan shop, trapped by ditherers everywhere. AAAAAAAAAAAaaaHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHhhh
 
Calm Down, Calm Down, it`s only a Forum lol,

I hate everybody , be in cars, on bikes, or walking, and wannabe`s.

You guys are ok as I have conversed with you and you talk sense with an aim in life which stops all the pratting about.
I sometimes wonder if they`re all out to get me.
 
Hec min, they know where ye live! Lock awe yer doors and windaes an hide under yer bed!!! The weirdos are comin tae get ye.....
 
RANT NO. 208...

Arseholes who drive aboot in the fog wi nae lights oan, or jist poncy wee side lights only so they think thir hyper visible....

.... it wiz hell o a foggy here yesterday and ah coonted 9, yes 9, cars wi nae lamps oan at all, oan way intae work ,ower a 28 mile drive...... Dae they nae teach **** all these days aboot basic highway code......brainless fuckwits...
 
ah am wan o they rare folk who will speak tae the Mormons, Jehovahs etc an the like oan the doorstep and end up tryin tae sell THEM somethin...fairly rattles them
 
Motorists who stay in the middle lane, it is an overtaking lane after all and as for coppers , why don`t they do anything?.
Parking on the pavement is another rant.............................see what I mean ? I can find fault with every man and his dog.
Dog doo on the pavements arghhhhhh!

That would be rough.... ,falling off yer steed and ending up rolling in dog s*** :lol:lol:lol:lol:lol fair tickled now:yes
 
hec, hope I don't ever catapult ma sel into yer feckin hedge ya bam.
 
Chavs who drive with fog lights on when it's not foggy, it's just dark you fuckwits.

Ooh look at me I have foglights - **** OFF SO HAVE I BUT I KNOW WHEN THEY ARE MEANT TO BE ON.

Drink wine. Calmer. Ah that's much better.
 
Right

I went to the Merry Hill Shopping Centre in Dudley.

Let's pause there shall we.

What the **** is "merry" about a shopping centre? **** all ... that's what

Anyway me Lucie wanted to go so we went on T instead of car

On arriving there was nowhere to park a bike ... I could have parked in a car bay but thought "no Newelly. Some **** will give you a ticket" so I parked on a paved area next to the cycle rack

You can see what's coming can't you?

2 hours later and with smiley dad face worn wafer thin we go back to T ... yep! £35 ******* ticket

I tried to reason with the **** in a hat that my actions were well intended. He told me I should have parked in a car space. It would be sooo good to roll in there early on a Saturday with say 20 bikes ... each take a car space and see wtf they say.

The following week I picked up a £75 ticket for parking in Wickes

The car park company g24 have no legal powers or authority so you can ignore their invoice (they cannot issue fines, only police and councils can do that) and ignore their demands and threats ... they are nothing better than pirates.

But unfortunately my company deducted the fine from my wages so despite my best efforts I can't get it back.

Once again ... I would love to park up for 91 mins in Wickes so G24 can get all excited. Worthless *******s

None of these private parking companies have the power to take money off you

You can ignore their letters and **** all will happen

**** ... now I really do need a drink
 
Arse! I have boycotted Asda for 2 yrs as I had a ticket from similar company. Cuntbox!!

Still not going to Asda ever again tho. Fuckers. Ok I wasn't parked properly but it was Xmas chaos FFS.
 
Cyclists, i dont mean normal kids, individuals or families. I mean those races that seem to happen all the time where they ride 6 across the road and have people by islands suggesting i stop to allow them not to have to WTF ?? It must be legal somehow to just drive through them.
Bloody arrogant idiots
 
pikeman said:
Cyclists, i dont mean normal kids, individuals or families. I mean those races that seem to happen all the time where they ride 6 across the road and have people by islands suggesting i stop to allow them not to have to WTF ?? It must be legal somehow to just drive through them.
Bloody arrogant idiots
Click to expand...

It wasn`t you who drove through a lot a few years ago . was it ??
 
Nooooooooo but they are really annoying and while im on a roll i got shouted at by walkers who were on the road and i had to move the car towards them as another car came the other way !! A big fat woman in the group told me to f off and stuck her finger up. I hit the brakes and reversed back for a chat and she went running off!! One helpfully told me they ancient rights to be walking in the road !! I exercised my modrn right to tell them to get lost.
 
How dare the bas turds.

Get oot ma road ya fuds, don't yer know I'm THE PIKEMAN.

FUD.
 
Don't talk to me about Easter.

Firstly, I don't really bother with chocolate ... I like spicy, savoury snacks me so that's Easter eggs taken care of. Nobody sells curried eggs at Easter (note, idea is mine)

Why at Easter, do parents get fleaced at £kin loads / kg when on any other day a bog standard bar of dairy milk is ok?

My youngest daughter Lucie is 13 ... so why did my missus bother hiding £30 of easter eggs in the garden for her to find?

Sorry ... but she'd have prefered them in a big carrier bag so she could concentrate on important things like fud book and text messages

Holiday weekend, sunny as arseholes and my T is fookered ... see post "got caught in a thunder storm"

So ... let's do some gardening instead!

Drove 20 miles to a garden centre to be turned away at the door by a spotty 18 year old **** in dungerees handing out leaflets saying "sorry, due to government legislation we are unable to trade on Easter Sunday"

What legislation is that!?

****** if I voted for that little pearl ... not did I vote to send £millions to Pakistan to say sozzard cos we bin rude innit.

I am not in the slightest bit "religious" ... and if all the Asian shops were open today ... why can't garden centres be open or kin Halfords (15 miles later)

Can Asian garden centres open I wonder? (Note ... Abduls Garden Emporium, off licence, and curried egg shop idea is mine)

So....moving on

"Sqeeeee -ploP!"

Another bottle of red

Wondering if T will start tomorrow

Waiting for Lucie to go to bed so I can raid her Easter egg stash.

That's all I have to say about that.
 
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